For an intellectual and sophisticated language, French can certainly be pretty infantile. Especially when babies are involved. Seeing a tiny bundle of joy seems to transform the most composed and respectable of French people into simpering ninnies. And soon expressions that are already nauseating in their cuteness, like pitchoune, minou, and coquine, take on the uber-cute -ette ending before gushing from proud parents' lips: "Hello, coquinette! How is my minette? Yes, pitchounette?" Ever taken care of a French baby for an afternoon? When the parents come home to their pauvre petit chou, they don't just say, "Thanks for watching Marie-Claire." They will cluck and coo: "Oh, have we been pouponning? Oh, yes, we've been pouponning, haven't we?" As they papottent, the parents will probably ask if you remembered to wrap their darling in her doudoune before going outside or if you tucked her doudou in with her at dodo time. Or whether her precious didis got dirty while she was playing in the gadoue.
If only it could end there, but the poor girl will probably be referred to as choupinette by her family till her 35th birthday—not to mention as bibi by her own sweet self for the rest of her life. . .
Lucille Ball as Lucy Ricardo. [Online image] 1953.
